In My Heart
by Rukie Martinez
Summary: Squeal to "Her Choice": Rukia has BIG NEWS for Toshiro, but how will he handle it? And Big brother, Byakuya, finally taking the role decides that Rukia shouldn't be with Toshiro, will things work out, or will secrets break them up? Read to find out!
1. Chapter 1

**Yes! I am back, and so are Toshiro and Rukia! This is the squeal to Her Choice! I am really excited about this, and I hope everyone enjoys it! XD **

Chapter One

"No, no, no, no, no! It is not true! I hope it's not true! I forbid it to be true! Why in the hell does it have to even apply to this? Dammit!" Rukia said, talking to herself. She held a pregnancy test. It had come back positive. Toshiro had no idea…no clue what she was doing. She was scared. What would Nii-sama think? What about Renji? Mostly what would the Council think? There had never been a baby born into the Soul Society. Dammit!

There was a knock on the door. Rukia jumped at the noise. She quickly disposed of the pregnancy test and opened the door. Lieutenant Matsumoto stood there with that stupid smile of hers. Why did she always seem happy all the time?

"Run-Chan! Did you come back positive?" she suddenly embraced Rukia tightly.

"H-How did you know about that?"

"I figured it out when I saw you puking in the toilet a few days ago. Although you also had been moody lately so I just figured" Matsumoto grinned and sat down on Toshiro's couch.

They were in his office. Only god knows why!

"Positive" Rukia said, sitting beside Rangiku. She squealed as loud as she could. Rukia only had one thought in her mind and that was to kill her. "Please don't tell Toshiro. Let me do it. I'll do it when the time is right"

"Okay. Fine" Rangiku pouted.

"Thank you"

A black butterfly fluttered into the room and the announcer spoke calming but the news was anything but calm.

"_**ALL SQUADS LISTEN UP! Menos have been reported spotted in the 7**__**th**__** district! All squads are to REPORT THERE!" **_

Rangiku and Rukia looked at each other for a long moment.

"You can't go" she finally said.

"Why not?" Rukia asked, already getting her sword out.

"Because you're pregnant for god's sake! You can't be putting your life in danger anymore. Well not until the baby is born, but still! You stay. I will talk to some people and they have to let you stay"

"Please don't tell them I'm pregnant, Lieutenant Matsumoto" she pleaded.

"Fine, but if you don't tell Captain Hitsugaya tonight, then I will. He probably won't believe me but he will question the fact that you might" Rangiku ran out the room.

Maybe she should tell him tonight. Then again if she gets more time she can ease into it. But how long will "more" be? Until she gets a belly?

She started walking toward the door to attend then request but then she felt something creep up on her. Everything went black and she knew she hit the floor hard.

~Toshiro~

Toshiro Hitsugaya ran toward the center, looking for Rukia. He knew that she bad been feeling a little sick lately so he didn't want to leave her by herself. He scoured the crowd. Nothing. _Where is she?_

Soi Fon and Kuchiki both stood at a tall peer and looked at the crowd. It seemed that they knew more then he did.

"Everyone stay calm!" Soi Fon shouted. Suddenly everyone went quiet. "Now that I have everyone's attention. It was just a drill. You all know very well by now that"

"How were we suppose to know?" Iba spoke out.

"I agree! We had real menos in our Society! You can't expect us to actually go to the real one if we think it's fake!" Ikkaku yelled, already walking back to his district.

"But you need to be prepared for if it does happen again!" Soi Fon jumped off the peer and stood in front of Ikkaku. "There are still places our squads are weak at"

"Yeah like squad 4" mocked one of 13th's squad members.

"Squad 13th is no better" Rangiku said. Toshiro looked at her and saw that she must have just arrived. "Everyone is equally the same"

"Thank you Lieutenant Matsumoto" Soi Fon said. "Now I want everyone to go back. Next time we have a drill, I want you to take it seriously!"

The crowd started to disburse. Toshiro walked back to his office. It seemed that it was getting pretty dark already. Where the day had gone? His squad walked back to their district and Toshiro was about to open then door when Matsumoto yelled something.

"Captain Hitsugaya! Kuchiki-san is pregnant! I am sorry I couldn't hold it anymore!" Toshiro turned to Rangiku.

"What?"

"Kuchiki. Rukia Kuchiki is pregnant. She told me earlier. Just before the alarm went off! I am sorry!" Matsumoto bowed.

"Don't be silly. She can't be. I used protection and she did too. We aren't idiots" He walked in, clearly worried about Rukia.

Rukia lay on the floor. Her stomach tightly pressed to the floor, and her face to a side. Toshiro and Rangiku quickly rushed to her and carried her to the couch. Sweat had come down her face. She WAS sick. No questions asked.

"Rukia…come on…its time to wake up" he patted Rukia's cheek. Her eyes slowly opened.

"Hmmmm….?" She slowly sat up, but her eyes seemed vacant.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Uh, yes…just hadn't slept in a long time, and I guess it caught up with me"

"Liar" Rangiku murmured under her breath.

Toshiro shot her a dirty look then he looked at Rukia, who seemed to slowly come back to planet earth.

"Oh, Toshiro. When did you get here?" her voice was stronger now, and her eyes seemed filled.

"This is my office" Rukia looked around.

"So it is"

"So I am going to take you to Unohana-" before he could finish Rukia interrupted with something that he knew in his heart.

"I am pregnant"


	2. Chapter 2

**Yay, I see some of my reviews! Thanks for review guys! I bet you guys didn't see that coming! I didn't hahaha! Some people wanted to know Byakuya's reaction so here you go! **

Chapter Two

~Toshiro~

Toshiro Hitsugaya sat on the couch with Rukia sitting beside him. His lieutenant handed her a hot cup of tea to calm her down. Rukia took a small sip of the tea and placed it back on the coffee table.

"Y-You're pregnant?"

He wasn't sure if he wanted to be a father yet. It was so soon. So early in the relationship...he couldn't handle the stress of crying in the middle of the night. The thought of not having Rukia all to himself. Damn.

"Yes. I am" She seemed a little distant from him. Her arms revealed small Goosebumps.

"A-Are y-you s-sure?" he couldn't keep a steady voice.

"As sure as I sit here" She gave a small smile toward him.

"Positive?" he said, making sure what he was hearing wasn't one of Matsumoto's plans to get him wired up.

"Dammit captain! She IS freaking pregnant! You HAVE to accept it! She can be FUCKING disowned from the Kuchiki Clan because of that baby! Now stop making an ASS of yourself!" Rangiku yelled at him. Then she realized it wasn't her place to do so and quickly added under her breath "In a nice way sir"

A vain had popped out of his temple. Rukia quickly stood, but soon getting dizzy and falling back to the couch. Toshiro quickly held her in his arms, and kissed her neck.

"I am accepting it. I just don't want my hopes to get up and find out it was a false pregnancy" He glared evilly at Rangiku.

"Sorry" she whispered. "Are you okay Run-Chan?" she asked Rukia, who seemed to be asleep already. Toshiro sighed and picked her up and placed her down on the pillow.

"Matsumoto, as your captain I advice you to never speak to me like that ever again" Rangiku nodded. "But as a friend I want to thank you for bringing me to my senses. I realized that it may be that I am suffering but it is Rukia who is the most. I did not once think that she could get disowned from her family because of the baby. So thank you" he knew he would regret those words.

Rangiku's face lit up instantly and she hugged Toshiro tightly, making his head squish perfectly between her breasts. Usually before he dated Momo he enjoyed the feeling of breasts…Rangiku's, but now he felt as though he could kill her.

"Let…go…Know your place Matsumoto" Rangiku let go and took a few steps back, her smile still wide.

"Hai!"

"Shhh! Rukia is sleeping!" he growled, placing a cover over Rukia.

She looked so cute when she slept. His eyes soften as he watched her sleep. He always watched. Then he got to thinking.

What would happen if "Brother" Byakuya decided to be a REAL brother this time and decided against it? By some chance he would allow it then what? There was the council 49 that would truly go against it. There was a reason babies were prohibited. The reason being that they were always so distracting and not needed.

What was he going to do? When the baby comes? And her belly will soon to show. He will have to talk to Ukitake about locking her up. But that wouldn't be fair to Rukia would it. He sighed in frustration.

"Making we should switch hours" Rangiku said. Toshiro looked at her confused. "What I mean is that take her out only in the night time. That way she still comes out but no one sees her"

How did she know what he was thinking? Did he say all of that out loud and not know it?

"She lives in the Kuchiki Manor. How will we hide that?"

"Captain Hitsugaya we can't hide it forever. There will have to be a time we tell everyone, and when that time comes we shall be ready for everything. Don't worry" her eyes softened and she walked out.

Well I better take her home, he thought. He picked her up started to take her to the Kuchiki Manor. Half way there he ran into Ukitake.

"Oh Shiro-Chan. It's late. Shouldn't you be in bed?" Ukitake looked at Rukia then back at him. "I see you and Rukia had fun" he smirked as he already started to walk away.

"Wait!" He looked back at Toshiro, and smiled.

"Yes?"

"Can we talk?"

"Yes. In my office. Bring Rukia. I have a feeling it's about her, no?"

"Hai"

Both walked to the 13th division. He placed Rukia on the couch and sat in the chair. Ukitake had served him some hot chocolate.

"Hot Chocolate?" Toshiro asked confused.

"I thought kids liked Chocolate" Ukitake scratched his head in confusion.

"I am not a kid! How many times to I-"

Ukitake held a hand out of candy. "Candy"

"No. I really need a favor from you, Jushiro"

Ukitake smirks and sits down. "Sure anything"

"I need you to send Rukia to the Land of the Living and block the gate so she can never come back to the Soul Society"


	3. Chapter 3

_**Hahaha I am having fun with this story! I uh am sorry it has taken a while. I do need to update on my stories (all of them) but I have been so busy lately that I had hardly had enough time to do this. **_

_**Chapter Three **_

"What?" Ukitake voice stretched out. His eyes had gotten wide.

"You see…can you keep a secret?"

Even though Ukitake could be a real bum lately Toshiro knew he could trust him. Besides he wouldn't say anything to hurt Rukia. He was like him. He only wanted to best for her.

"Of course I can" he put a cross on his heart then sipped his lips shut. Toshiro sighed.

"Rukia is pregnant you see. And I am sure both Captain Kuchiki and Council 49 will try in their power to stop this baby from being taken in. I want her to be safe and have her baby in the Land of the Living"

Toshiro let Ukitake take in all the information at once. He just sat there speechless. What was he to say? What could someone say? He was choosing to make the right choice and turn him and Rukia in, or help him.

"Even if I do so, and we get Rukia in the Land of the Living, are you planning for her to have and raise her child there? For the baby to grow up without a father? Or were you planning to find a way to ease the topic in the meeting and make the council understand?" Ukitake spoke, his eyes beaming into Toshiro's.

"I just want her safe. Far away from the council and Captain Kuchiki. If she is safe then that's all that matters, right?" Toshiro relaxed back on the couch.

"Wrong!" Ukitake yelled.

"Wrong?" Toshiro asked, lifting an eyebrow.

"Think boy! The council might leave Rukia alone. And if they do, they will probably take your position away as a captain and maybe a soul reaper. And nothing is stopping Kuchiki from following Rukia in the land of the living. When hears of Rukia's sudden trip for so long then he will worry! He won't admit it but he will!"

"Then we have to have him send someone else in his shoes. Abarai maybe" Toshiro tried to think of the girl with orange hair but he couldn't remember her name well.

"Maybe. But we aren't positive if the council won't go after her even if she is in the land of the living! And what about the fact that you might be removed from being a soul reaper?" Ukitake seemed pretty mad.

"I'll take whatever is coming to me. Listen, Ukitake, I'm afraid just as much as Rukia. I am afraid they might kill her along with our baby. I am afraid that she will hate me if I never see her again. I'm afraid"

"I understand, Hitsugaya. Let's just make sure this information stays with us for now. Send Abarai. I wanna have a chat with him"

Toshiro nodded and walked out.

~Ukitake~

Renji Abarai…Byakuya Kuchiki's lieutenant. Ukitake smirked at the thought of the pairing.

Renji poked his head in his office.

"You wanted to see me captain?" he asked, his voice quite shy.

"Yes, come in and have a seat"

Renji entered the room and took a seat in the same place Toshiro had sat. His eyes were glued on the floor.

"May I ask what this is concerning?" Renji asked.

"Yes, you may. It is concerning Rukia" Renji's eyes shot up at Ukitake.

"Is everything alright?" He was suddenly loud and out of his seat.

"I'm not sure yet. But there is a huge favor I need to ask of you Abarai" Renji looked at him and nodded. "Tomorrow Rukia leaves for a trip. A long one. One where she won't come back to the Soul Society. She has Toshiro's child in her and she must be safe"

"That small basterd! He got Rukia pregnant?" Renji curled his fist and punched the wall.

"Yes"

"And where do I come in?" he asked, still half mad.

"You are going to lie to your captain and tell him you are watching over her to make sure nothing happens to her"

"Will that be true?" Renji sat back down.

"Sort of. She will indeed watch over her to make sure she doesn't kill herself, but you also will make sure Byakuya doesn't have a reason to go with Rukia. Understood?"

"Hai"

"Good. Now I was saving some sweets for Toshiro but I doubt he will come back tonight. Would you like to have some? I also have some sake. It's really good" Ukitake smiled.

"No thank you. I have duties to attend to. I will not fail you or Captain Hitsugaya" Renji bowed then left.

Ukitake pouted. Now who is going to share these yummy treats with me? Alone again? He said to himself. He really needed to get himself a girl.

"Hmmm…I wonder what Nemu is doing right now?" he asked himself, and quickly went to find her.


	4. Chapter 4

**I know I keep promising Byakuya's reaction. I get so into the story that I forget. I promise soon you will see his reaction!**

Chapter Four

Toshiro Hitsugaya carried Rukia toward the Kuchiki Manor. It almost looked like a Captain's room but it was about six times bigger then a regular captain's room. Captain Kuchiki had refused to live in the squad 6's districted. Of course to keep him on the squads they wanted to make him happy and let him live his little life by himself.

A maid opened the door and bowed.

"Captain Hitsugaya. What do we owe the- Is Kuchiki-Sama alright?" She looked straight into my eyes.

"Yes. She fell asleep in my office again and I wanted to return her to her rightful place"

There were three people that didn't know that they had been dating. Council 49, The Kuchiki Manor, and mostly Byakuya Kuchiki. Everyone tried so hard to hide the fact about them dating as hard as they can. Toshiro had been making sure he was never around Rukia when Byakuya was in sensing distance. Then they wanted to make sure none of the servants knew because everyone knew how much like to gossip.

"Was she visiting Lieutenant Matsumoto again?"

That was their excuse.

"Yes. Please take her. I got a ton of paper work to do"

Hands wrapped around Rukia's body and held her in a small embrace. Captain Kuchiki glared at Toshiro.

"Thank you. Now go"

Toshiro bowed and resisted kissing Rukia's head and left without another word.

~Rukia~

Rukia woke up to the nice chirping of birds. She stretched her arms in front of her and yawned. She felt great. The best she had slept in weeks. As her eyes adjusted toward the bright sun she noticed a dark figure in the corner of the room.

"Renji?" she rubbed her eyes and saw who it really was. "Nii-sama"

"Why do you always got Captain Hitsugaya's office?" he asked. Rukia looked at him in the eyes; he didn't seem to want to look at hers.

"To visit Lieutenant Matsumoto" her answer like always.

"If that is so then why does Captain Hitsugaya bring you and not Lieutenant Matsumoto her self?"

"I dunno"

A vein popped out of his head, but then he calmed himself down easily.

"Anyway, get your things packed. Captain Yamamoto and Captain Ukitake both agree to send you to the land of the living for a few drills. I arranged secretly for Kurosaki to train you to be a better swordsman"

"Hai"

Fighting? Why didn't Toshiro stop them? Was she seriously going to have to train while being pregnant? Nii-sama started to walk out the door, then stopped at the door way.

"Lieutenant Abarai insisted in companying you on your training" he left her room, closing the door without much effort.

Rukia sighed. What was she going to do now?

She spent her whole day packing. What was to come from this training adventure? She surly never heard about it being in the land of the living. Maybe in old battle grounds in the Soul Society but not in the land of the living.

**I wanted to end it early because in the next chapter I want it to start off with her already in the land of the living. XD **


	5. Chapter 5

**Gah! Sorry I haven't updated in awhile. Totally busy with school work and stuff. I am gonna try to update more and more. Kay? Well that and a reviewer kind of hurt my feelings. Ha-ha **

Chapter Five

~Rukia~

I closed my eyes and reopened them. I didn't expect to be back in Kurakara Town once more. I thought I'd stay in the Soul Society with Toshiro…I guess I was wrong.

I walked up to Ichigo's door and knocked once. Renji, my childhood friend, stood by my side. His back was straight and tall. His dark red hair was up in a pony tail. His tattoos visible to those who had a front view of him, and his strict face set on the door. He looked as though he was protecting a princess from a monster.

My hair was pulled back into a small braid with a ribbon latching from the bottom. I wore a green summer dress with silver out linings. My fingernails were painted white and the white shoes made me look compete. My black raven hair shone in the sun's rays as did my dark purple eyes.

Isshin Kurosaki, a tall crazed parent, answered the door. His expression grew as he recognized me at instant.

"Rukia! It has been so long! Come in! Come in" he had practically yanked me through the front door.

Once inside I looked around the Living room that led into the kitchen/dinning area. It had in deed been almost a year since I laid eyes onto the olden house.

"Long time, no see" Karin, Ichigo's little sister, said.

"Are you hungry? You must me tired! Let me cook you some food!" Yuzu, Karin's twin sister, said.

"No thank you. I ate before I came. Maybe later" I smiled my famous actress smile and bowed once to them. "Thank you for letting me stay here once more. I am in your debt, Kurosaki Family"

Renji stood by my side without any words of his own.

"You are staying here again?" Said a dark voice. I knew that voice instantly. Ichigo Kurosaki.

Ichigo was a 5'8 Junior High School student. His bright orange hair and hazel brown eyes seemed to suit him. He would look weird if he had black hair like everyone else.

Ichigo walked down the stairs wearing his winter uniform and carry on bag on his shoulder. His hands were in his pockets as if it made him look cooler.

"Ichigo, that's mean!" Yuzu said, getting ready to turn into his mom.

"It's okay" I sniffled. "I understand if Ichigo doesn't want me around…I am always brothering you nice people for a place to stay while we set up funeral arrangements for my grandpa" I started to cry.

Tears started to pour down Yuzu's and Isshin's cheeks.

"No! You're no trouble at all! Stay as long as you want!"

That is all I need to say in order to reassure that our visit wasn't in vane.

"Ichigo! Show Miss. Rukia to her room" Isshin said, throwing my luggage at him, he caught it with his hand.

"Gah! Fine! Come on" there was something in voice that made me want to hit him. Renji followed us up the stairs.

~Toshiro~

Toshiro Hitsugaya, a small white haired man, stood at the gates to the world of the living. Even though the idea to send her away was all his idea he still couldn't believe she was gone. Just because he knew she was safe doesn't mean that he wouldn't miss her. He would miss the way her hot lips sunk in deeply into his and they soon would make incredible love to each other.

"Why must you stand at the door, Captain Hitsugaya? Unless there is something you forgot to tell me" Captain Kuchiki said, standing beside him.

"Of course not. If you excuse me I got plenty of paperwork to attend to" he started to walk off, but Byakuya swung his sword and Toshiro easily blocked his attacked. "Captain Kuchiki! Control yourself!"

"I am not as idiotic as you think. I've known about the baby since Rukia told Lieutenant Matsumoto. I've known you guys have been dating behind mine and Council 49's back. I am not stupid as you might think"

Toshiro narrowed his aquamarine eyes at Byakuya's dishful eyes. They stared each other down and before they knew it both began fighting. Sword clashing against sword. Toshiro knew very well who was stronger, but this was the part where Ukitake and he talked about. The hard part. The part where he would lose a position he had tried so hard to get at. Although it was kind of sad to fight a fellow captain he also wanted to fight for Rukia's honor.

Was he only to protect her because he felt guilty that he put her through all of this, or did he actually care enough to fight because he loved her? That part he didn't have to think about. He did love Rukia. He loved her more then Momo. He loved her more then any girl he had ever met. So why was he reconsidering? Was there more to her pregnancy that he didn't want to think about? What was going on in his heart that made him doubt all the safety he already had in store for her?

A love for someone can only go so far. Their love can only take you so far that you might end up confused in emotions and self-cautiousness as much as loss.

Toshiro banged his sword as hard as he could against Byakuya's. He slid his sword up and down the thick steeled sword and tried to confuse him, but Byakuya was a mastered Swordsmen. Probably the better then Ichigo himself.

"I won't let you win!" Toshiro growled deeply.

He could hear the crowd forming around them. A few captains, Captains; Soi Fon, Ukitake, and Mayuri. A couple of lieutenants, Lieutenants; Ikkaku and Kira. They all watched the two grown Captains fights. The two captains who hardly show emotion now showing more then ever.

"I won't let you have Rukia. She is all I have left!" He slammed his sword harder against Toshiro's sword, making him back away a little.

"What do you mean all you have left?" Toshiro dropped his sword half way, making Byakuya come back to his senses. Soon he was back to his emotionless self.

"Never mind" he turned away and started to walk away.

"Wait!" Toshiro followed Byakuya into his empty office. "What did you mean all you had left? Tell me!"

Byakuya sat down at his desk and stared out the window. "Do you really want to know? The truth may shock you. Rukia's and mine past may give you a reason to leave her…"

Toshiro nodded, determined to know about their past.


	6. Chapter 6

**LinG08- I don't think you comprehend the name "Fan-Fiction" that means our imaginations can be let wild. Now, you insulted my writing in your comment. If you talk about not getting the whole point of the story and complaining about my points then why read it? Don't read what you don't like. You, need to loosen up a bit and let your wild side show. **

**Now I had notice you hadn't said one nice thing about my story. Not one. I don't care if you think I am a bitch getting mad, but I get really edgy at people who can't say nice things about others. Thank you. **

**StarPrincess999- Ha-ha for some reason I enjoy your comments the most. You have always been my personal favorites because you were my first review. XD**

**Denidene- I'll see if I can get things moving a little faster for you. Send me ideas you want for the story and I'll see if I can fit them in. **

**ShadowPain- You have also been a personal favorite of mine. I always love getting your comments and reading your stories. You, and Star, are always a great pride of mine. **

**If I forgot to thank you personally then I'll give you something special later on. XD Its short because I want the next chapter to go back to Byakuya. **

Chapter Six

~Rukia~

Today was day one of my special training. I didn't know what neither Ichigo nor Urahara had in store for me. Was I supposed to work hard with a baby on its way? Or tell them? It would probably be best to keep quiet, just in case.

I sat up in a small bed, that was probably just a few inches longer then I. The silk out lining reminded me of home. Everything in the best it could be and everything in its rightful place.

"Finally you're awake" Yuzu Kurosaki, Ichigo's little sister, said. Her smile was surprising bright. Why so happy and cheerful in the morning?

"Good morning" I forced a small smile onto my face.

"Good afternoon" she corrected me. I wanted so bad to roll my eyes but I didn't. I sighed in frustration and got up for my first day of training.


	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry for the last chapter! Thanks for the reviews. **

**Chapter Seven**

~Toshiro~

Toshiro sat in Byakuya's office. The thick wooden desk was a few yards from a smaller wooden desk. Byakuya's desk was tall with golden edges. A small pile of papers were stacked with a tiny paper-clip keeping them together.

"Uh, Captain Kuchiki…." He didn't feel like going on. Toshiro felt as though the whole room was frozen in time.

Byakuya stared out the window, but it looked as though he saw nothing. Toshiro saw Byakuya's eyes shift toward him. They locked gazes for several seconds before Toshiro spoke.

"Tell me…"

A heavy sigh escaped through Byakuya's lips. His eyes closed tightly, and his body turned toward Toshiro. He slowly opened his eyes, as though looking threw Toshiro.

"Rukia, she is all I have left of…Hisana. Hisana was my wife, and Rukia's sister."

Toshiro had heard small parts about Hisana from Rukia, but she didn't really go deep into the subject.

"I cared deeply for Hisana. She wasn't a noble, but a peasant. Can you believe that? Just a peasant…" he let the last word trail off, then gave out a small chuckled. "I was a fool to have fallen in love with her. For the first time I pushed aside my pride and the law…

"The second time was to save Rukia. I saved her for one reason. Not because of a promise I had made, but for myself. I knew that if I lost Rukia I would loose Hisana forever"

"Promise?" Toshiro asked, shifting in his seat.

Byakuya started to tell Toshiro on how Hisana searched day and night for Rukia, though her health wasn't good. Byakuya went on to tell him after Hisana's passing that he too searched for on Hisana's last dying wish; and how he promised her he would find and protect Rukia. He even told Toshiro about his second promise of defending the law.

"When did you realize about Rukia and me? When I brought her to your house so often or when she didn't show up that one night?"

"Fool" his voice changed from compassion to cold and harsh. "I've known since the day you guys first met. I could feel that she was at your office, while Lieutenant Matsumoto was in the world of the living. I only kept quiet because I hoped Rukia would show some respect and dump you"

Anger slowly built into Toshiro's mind. "Then why the hell did you agree to send Rukia if you knew that she was Pregnant?" his voice rose higher.

"I agreed because I hoped an "accident" would happen and the baby would die. Do you understand now? I've always been one step ahead of you…even if you don't understand"

"How have you been one step ahead of me?" Toshiro couldn't control his anger anymore.

"The same way you were one step behind me"

~Rukia~

Our swords clashed hard against each other. My arms started to shake swiftly in place. I felt my stomach cramping up as I made these big movements with my arms.

Ichigo smirked as he slid his sword up and down mine.

"You're slow" he said, moving away a few inches.

"Wipe that stupid face off your head" I said, smirking.

Ichigo's face turned into a small grin, and he chuckled slightly.

"You're funny. I've missed that about you" he stepped close to me. We both were sweating tremendously.

"Get back in position" I ordered, getting ready to attack.

Ichigo smirked and we were off once more. We practiced for almost an hour before my stomach was in major pain. Ichigo cocked his head slightly, and walked over to me.

"Don't tell me you're giving up already?" he had his sword pointed at my heart.

"Ichigo…I can't" I had to force those last words out of my mouth.

"Yes you can. Toshiro, Byakuya, and Yamamoto put me in charge. I'm going to keep you in shape. Now get ready to fight"

"I said I can't!" I sat down on a heavy gray limestone rock.

"I don't think so" he swung his sword hard at me. I didn't even try to stop the sword. My eyes shot close, waiting for the pain.

"That's not nice" I looked up at Renji, who held his sword to block Ichigo's.

"This isn't your training, Renji. It's Rukia's"

"If she says she's tired then she WILL take a break" Renji insisted.

Ichigo and Renji dropped their swords, both staring evilly at one another. I could feel the tension between the two. None of this kind of thing happened before she started daring.

"I…" Ichigo started.

"I…" Renji repeated, as if trying to finish his sentence.

"I don't care" his voice was hard and cold. He never really spoke this rough to anyone.

"You filthy son of a bit-"

"Enough!" I yelled, standing to my feet. "That's enough. Ichigo, we are done for today. We will pick up tomorrow morning. Now if you excuse me I need to place a call"

~Toshiro~ 

"I don't understand!" Toshiro sat in the office of Jushiro Ukitake. After the small insentient Byakuya Kuchiki pulled off earlier that day he didn't have the patient to deal with anyone else. "Why did Byakuya think it would make me want to break up with Rukia? None of this makes sense!" Toshiro was ready to pull out his hair.

"Calm down. I will tell you Rukia's side of the story" Toshiro lifted an eyebrow at Ukitake. "Better yet. I have her diary here. It's only good to read it to gain knowledge, no?" Ukitake showed Toshiro a black and purple book no bigger then an address book.

"I won't read her personal thought!" Toshiro cried out, snatching the book and putting it in his sleeve, so that he could return it back to its rightful place.

"Consider it my boy. I've read it, and there are some seriously deep things in there. Not even, Byakuya himself could understand the pain she goes through"

Toshiro said nothing, and walked off.

.

.

.

.

Toshiro walked back into his office. He was tired. The day was hard and stressful. He needed some peace and mind. He placed the diary on his desk and sat on the couch. He took a deep breath and relaxed.

No matter how much he tried to sleep the diary kept calling to him. It was like the diary had a mind of its own. Well it wouldn't hurt if he just peeked…. Before he could give it a second thought his cell phone went off. He looked down at the phone and saw that it was Rukia.

He quickly answered but didn't say a word.

"Hello?" her voice was frail and soft.

"Rukia!" he sighed in relief.

"Yes…Toshiro, I don't think that being here is good for my baby. Please bring me back!" her plead was almost a sob.

"I know, I know…tell me what happened"

"It's Ichigo…he is being really rough on me…the baby isn't safe…I think its dying!"

Toshiro's face popped open and he quickly reassured her that everything was fine. After he hung up with her he looked at the diary once more. He NEEDED to know more about Rukia. He needed to know the huge secret that kept both Ukitake and Kuchiki from talking about it.


	8. Chapter 8

_**Chapter Eight **_

October 13th

Dear Diary,

I've always felt like the world around me hates me. Life it's self is harsh and unusual. As, I write to you, my heart is filled with mysterious and unknown pain. I shall tell you once and for all what and who I really am.

Before I met Renji, my childhood friend, I had done something…something so horrible that my life may be endanger to this very day.

I killed people in my life. People who loved and supported me. I killed my own mother and sister. You see, mom had died giving birth to me, and Hisana died trying to protect me. Also my old mentor. I killed him on the spot.

Why wasn't I strong enough? Why couldn't I help the people I care about? If this was going to happen in the future then there is no point to live or love. Is there? I might as well give up and never try again!

Rukia

October 31st

Dear Diary,

I think I finally found my one true love…my other half. His name is Ichigo Kurosaki. He is just amazing! I can't believe I was just as lucky to find him. I thought I couldn't ever love again…and when I had lost all hope in love. He was there to help me. I can't see anything that can go wrong with this relationship. I…I just love him so much, but I was afraid to tell him how I really felt.

Rukia

Toshiro noticed that Ichigo's name was crossed out. Could Rukia have done that after she met him? Or did someone else read it? Then again, Ukitake told him that he too had read Rukia's diary. God knows if anyone else did. He kept reading.

February 2nd

Dear Diary,

These two girls had beaten me up. I wanted to fight back so much but the whole time I was thinking about Kaien. He wouldn't have allowed me to hurt two mortal girls. I ended up with two broken ribs and a black eye. I will have to stay away from Ichigo until my Gigai heals right. I don't want to worry him over a stupid fight.

Now, that I think about it, the girls were in Ichigo's class. Could they like him too? I don't know if I will be that strong to fight for Ichigo like that. I think I have too much pride to help out someone in need…well at least that's what Byakuya would tell me. "Don't ever show pity or emotions to anyone. It's only a sign of weakness. And, if you slip then show them that you have a huge sense of pride"

I don't know if I could do something like that. I like helping people. I like seeing their happy faces after I save them. But Byakuya insisted that I tried. So I must.

Rukia

February 3rd

Dear Diary

I don't know what to do anymore! Ichigo is such a pig! He only got with me just so he could touch me! I wasn't ready in the least! I don't even think I want my first time to be with him!

In a weird way, I don't really like Ichigo. Like at first I thought I did but the emotions slid away from me. I actually think hatred was forming. But now the hatred is true. No one uses, Kuchiki Rukia like that! I'm never going to forgive him for what he had done!

Rukia

March 1st

Dear Diary,

I met someone…his name is Toshiro Hitsugaya.

Toshiro stopped and shut the book tightly.

"What does she mean she killed her mentor?" Toshiro said to himself. "Is she really a criminal?"

~Rukia~

I closed my eyes as I laid on the bed. Renji went to Urahara's to pick me up some "plus clothes" that way I can sleep in them. Yuzu, Karin, and Isshin had left for another round at the store. It was just me and Ichigo.

I was a little scared to be alone with him. I don't know if I could trust him. For all I know he could be still in love with me. I'm not trying to sound conceited, but it could happen…maybe.

No! I shouldn't be thinking like that! It's almost been a year since we had broken up. He should have moved on by now…hopefully. There was a knock on the door.

"Come in" my words were emotionless.

Ichigo walked in and stood in front of my bed. I looked up at him and smiled.

"Hey"

"Hey" I responded.

"I'm going to finish it" he said, sitting on the bed beside me.

"Finish what?" I was confused. What did he mean?

"This"

He quickly slapped me onto the bed and held my arms above my head. He kissed me quickly everywhere and moved fast. I struggled to break free but he was too strong. He sat in a position where I couldn't kick him off or slap him. I tried to scream but every time I tried he would quickly hit me. I didn't know what to do.

I was powerless…I wasn't in control of my life anymore…I was going to die.

Toshiro…


	9. Chapter 9

**Sorry it took me awhile. I was trying to get into this school for talented people, and I got accepted! So I'll make this chapter the most exciting and virtual chapter yet! (A.k.a. more drama!)**

**Chapter Nine**

~Toshiro~

Toshiro realized, after he returned the diary to Ukitake, that he know all the facts about her. He needed to go to someone who knew every single detail about her. Someone who had all her history and records. Head Captain Yamamoto.

The walk went by fast. He couldn't remember the last time he had to go to Head Captain Yamamoto. It's been way too long. But, he was focused more on the fact that if he knew about Rukia. About her being pregnant. Sweat glands slid down his temple and down to his cheek. He felt his heart speeding up.

He entered the building and walked down a narrow hallway. Each step echoed…each step he felt his face grow hot. The back of his neck began to sweat. Before he could knock lightly on Head Captain Yamamoto's door a response awoke. "Enter" the voice was old yet strong.

Toshiro entered the dim lighted room. He walked straight to Yamamoto's desk and bowed as low as he could. He needed to show all the respect he could.

"Captain Toshiro Hitsugaya. What is it that you've come to talk to me about?" his voice was flat.

"Uh, I'm sorry for interrupting you and your paperwork but this was urgent news" he couldn't find himself to make his voice seem important enough. Yamamoto waited. "Um, yes. It concerns Miss. Kuchiki Rukia of squad 13"

"Are you filing that she is pregnant, Mr. Hitsugaya?" he asked, his eyebrow rising.

"H-How did you know about that?"

"That doesn't matter. The fact is that you didn't report that to me right when you found out! That is a capital offense. What do you have to say for yourself?"

"Who the hell told you?" Toshiro was on his toes now.

Yamamoto sighed heavily. "Captain Kuchiki of squad 6"

"Kuchiki…"

Toshiro left in a sudden twist. He was going to kill him.

"We sent troops to get Kuchiki Rukia. She'll come back here and have her baby killed"

Toshiro stopped, halfway out the door. His eyes frozen in horror. He wanted to kill Yamamoto for even thinking of killing his baby! He was going to kill Yamamoto for sending troops out! His Rukia was probably in danger right now and now he had to save her! Stupid Soul Society!

"Good. I have your attention" he said.

Toshiro threw his fist back, going to punch Yamamoto, but a hand stopped him.

"Move it, Chojiro!" Toshiro growled at squad one's lieutenant.

"No one lays a hand on my captain for any reason" he hissed.

"Then I'll force you!"

Toshiro kicked Chojiro's upper chest, but he only caught his foot and twisted it, making Toshiro fall onto the ground.

"ENOUGH!" Yamamoto yelled, clearly pissed off.

They both went quiet. A force of habit. Toshiro stared into the eyes of this man.

"That joke was inappropriate" Toshiro glowered.

"Was it?" Yamamoto answered.

~Rukia~

I laid there on the bed, frozen in terror. My entire body shook in fear and displeasure. Each and single part of my body ached with pain and bruises. I was completely nude, and uncovered by the blanket I laid on.

I stared up at the ceiling, breathing pretty hard and uneven. I cried. I cried like I never cried before. Harder then when I killed Kaien. Harder when I lost my childhood friends. I sobbed.

"There. By the way. It was me that night. Not Kon. That basterd was somewhere in Karakura" Ichigo laughed.

I couldn't move myself to hit him. I was in disbelief.

"And another-"

A fist went hitting Ichigo across the cheek. Blood spattered everywhere. My eyes widened when I saw that Renji had punched Ichigo.

"R-Renji?"

"What the hell did you do? You better wish that you didn't do what I think you did! I'm going to kick your ass!"

"Let's see you try, pineapple"

Before I knew I saw that they were in a fight. I pulled myself up and quickly put undergarments on. My feet pulled me toward the corner of the room. I wasn't focused on the actual fight. Just the pain that radiated through my body. It wasn't pleasure. It was the opposite. I don't think I can describe it. In a way, more like someone went through my body and kicked all my organs.

"R-Renji…" my felt myself get dizzy. Renji didn't hear me. I tried to speak louder. But I couldn't.

I suddenly felt the ground below me fall, and the colors of the rooms followed. Hands caught me in time. Toshiro…

His eyes looked so hurt. Like he didn't get here in time.

"I'm sorry" was the last thing I said before I passed out from the pain.


	10. Chapter 10

**Her memory was a little different then the actual story, but you guys get over it (and if you leave a mean comment about it, I'll get mad). I wanted to change it a little bit. **

**But other then that enjoy the story, Kay? :) **

**Chapter Ten **

It was a dark and cold night. The night didn't seem to fill the air well. I could only be happy for being with my captain and mentor. We ran through a separated forest in the land of the living. The trees weren't bunched together but separated in feet's.

Captain Jushiro Ukitake and Lieutenant Kaien Shiba were on either side of me. They both wanted to make sure that we would all be protected in each direction. When I say "we" I mean me.

Suddenly the spiritual energy hit me like a pound of bricks. I'm pretty sure my captain and lieutenant felt the same pressure long before I did. I felt my self shake at the amount it had given off. This was my 7th mission I have done since I officially became a Soul Reaper. I was excited, and believed I could take anything down. I developed my brother's pride.

We could see the Hallow now. It was at least seven feet tall and three feet wide. Hundreds of tentacles swerved in different directions. Kaien didn't seem to worry, he held a hard face.

"Permission to go alone, Captain" Kaien said, without looking.

"Granted"

My eyes flashed worried toward Ukitake.

Kaien was off before I could protest. He couldn't handle this Hallow on his own, could he? Surely not!

"No" Ukitake held one arm in front of me. That's when I realized that I was about to march in that battle and pull him away. "He's not only fighting for the life of his wife, but for his pride. If you were to step in right now and save him then you'll make him loose his pride as a Soul Reaper and as a man"

I nodded uneasily and stared at the battle going on. I suddenly saw something I wished I could erase from my memory. One of the tentacles slid into Kaien's mouth, and then it filled every ounce of his body. Kaien's eyes turned black and his skin went pale. I gasped.

"Kaien…" I breathed.

"Run Rukia!" I looked hesitantly at my captain then I started to run away.

I ran away like a fool. Leaving behind my friends and my pride. What kind of soul reaper was I? I couldn't handle this? Of course I could, but did I know what it took to save Kaien? Yes. I knew how to save him. I'll have to kill him to save him. I'll save his pride.

I quickly ran back toward the battle ground. My legs threatened to give up on me but I kept going. I wanted to go faster. Both my sides began to ache. My feet hollowed and made a noise every time I took a step. My heart was pounding and dying at the same time.

I saw them. Ukitake held the sword blocking Kaien's. They were fighting. Ukitake sensed me and said "I told-you to go!" he growled.

I didn't answer. I couldn't.

Before I knew it, Ukitake was on his back and was breathless.

Kaien threw his sword down, I blocked it. I had to protect Ukitake.

"Rukia…" Ukitake glowered.

"Stand back, Captain Ukitake…"

I clashed swords with Kaien. We blocked and swung for what seemed hours. A tear escaped my eye. SLASH.

My sword when straight through him. His eyes went back to normal. He fell into my arms, and I held him, my sword still in his body. He was still alive, but barely. He held my back, his warm flesh, now cold. He was crying too. Those tears made me feel a little better though.

"Thank you, Rukia. Thank you for setting me free"

I felt his body go limp.

"Kaien…Kaien? Kaien!" I screamed.

I cried for hours. Maybe even days. I lost track. I couldn't stop crying. He was my mentor…my lieutenant…my friend…there to have been a better way to save him. There had to have been one! I killed Kaien Shiba! I shall never be forgiven for doing this. I'll never ask for it nor will I hope that some day I'll receive it by one kind heart.

~Rukia~

I woke up slowly from the nightmare. I felt that my face was covered in deep sweat and in the arms of my boyfriend, Toshiro Hitsugaya. I couldn't help but blush at his cute face.

"T-Toshiro?" I whimpered.

He looked down at me and smiled. I looked around. We were moving. Fast. Where were we going? He seemed to noticed my awareness and answered with two words "Soul Society"

It was nice to hear his gentle words again. It made me smile. I was happy. But why did he come for me? What happened to me? I tried to think as hard as I could but nothing popped up. I couldn't remember. Something to do with Ichigo. He did…then he…but I remember feeling his pain…or was it my pain that I felt?

I wasn't sure. It something to do with deep lust. Lust?

"Hold on…we're almost there, kay?" he entered the soul society. I closed my eyes again, suddenly feeling extremely tired for some strange reason. Toshiro shook me lightly, making me open them. "Stay awake a while longer. Okay?" he smiled and before I knew it, he placed me on some type of gurney.

"Unohana will be here soon" he held my hand.

"Captain Unohana? For what?" it took me awhile to focus me eyes straight on his.

"You don't remember?" I shook my head.

"You had a miscarriage"


	11. Chapter 11

**Sorry for waiting so long to update, I got into one of my other stories. Inside Edition: Bleach Interviews, and Zombie Land**. **On with the story, shall we? : D oh by the way, I'm changing my writing style a little. So please try to hold on.**

**Chapter Eleven **

"M-Miscarriage? That's nearly impossible!" Rukia couldn't keep the alertness from her voice. "How do you know I had the miscarriage? Maybe I was with my monthly friend! Some pregnant women do that, you know?" Tears rolled down her cheeks and disappeared under her jaw.

"Please calm down. This is all my fault…I'm so sorry I couldn't protect you. I should have been more aware that Ichigo was still an ass-shit!" Toshiro punched the side of Unohana's wall.

"The baby is fine." A quiet yet gentle voice said from behind Toshiro.

"My baby is alive?" Rukia's voice went high, making her seem out of place.

She finally took a long look around her. She was back in the Soul Society. It felt nice to be back here. It was some place she felt most at heart. Near the people she cared for deeply. Nii-sama, Toshiro, Renji…Hanataro. People she would risk her life dearly for. A place that had taken her out of pain yet brought her back into it.

"Yes. You have 'Post traumatic syndrome'. Here in the Soul Society that means that you have gone through something so huge that it may affect the way the baby is born. Usually the baby may come out slightly small or not be completely healthy. During the-incident your body tried to get rid of extra eternal bleeding you had" Unohana spoke quietly and gently to make sure that there was no real reason to panic. Rukia understood this.

Rukia had noticed that Unohana had used the word 'incident' instead of rape. It was gentler but it didn't make the pain go away any less. Did that bother her? Not really.

"Eternal bleeding?" Toshiro asked, trying to phase that fact that Ichigo might have done something harmful to both his love and his child.

"Unfortunately yes. We will have to operate. Sadly we don't usually don't have that type of equipment in the Soul Society. Not the type that are safe for babies"

They all went silent. Everyone in that room was thinking of a way to get an idea of how they were going to save the baby and Rukia.

"I'll go back" her words were spoken as though they were spoken by someone else. A stranger.

"No!" Toshiro had gone to his feet, releasing Rukia's hand. "It's way too dangerous!"

Unohana nodded her head. "Indeed. It's not even safe for you to be here. Captain Kuchiki, Captain Soi Fon, and Captain Yamamoto all agreed that your baby must be killed for the greater good of this society. They sent squad 2 troops to the land of the living in search for you and every other soul reaper is searching"

Rukia didn't respond for a long moment then she finally said something both Toshiro and Unohana were afraid to hear. "Then it looks like we're going to Hueco Mundo"

~Toshiro~ 

Toshiro had gone quickly to his office to grab a few last minute supplies. He was grateful when his lieutenant had not been there to take up more of his time. He just quickly grabbed his sword, an emergency kit that Ukitake had supplied him with a long time ago, and finally Rukia's diary.

As he was on his way back to his lovely love he noticed that almost every soul reaper was out and searching for his beloved. Even Momo. Toshiro had not really paid attention to her on purpose it just happened. He had stopped in his mid-ways and just stared at her. His heart began to pound heavily against his chest. Did he still have feelings for her? After all she had done?

Momo had stopped running as she noticed someone staring at her. She looked at Toshiro and smiled sweetly. They must have stared at each other for awhile because Momo then shook her head and kept running. Toshiro did the same thing and ran to the person he had got pregnant and loved.

_What is a Kuchiki? Is it nor foot, nor hand, nor breast? _

Toshiro looked at Rukia. She was slightly pale but other than that fine. She gripped her almost flat stomach. Her eyes smiled into his. He wish that he could do the same but his scene with Momo made him feel as though he cheated. The guilt would soon consume him.

"Ready, Toshiro?" Her voice was shaky. Was she really okay? Was the Eternal bleeding really processing so fast?

"Yes"

Unohana had opened an illegal gate into Hueco Mundo and the two were off once more. This time Toshiro felt like Joseph taking Mary to Bethlehem.


End file.
